I Feel So BLAH ~!

I don't know why but today I woke up felling yucky, and unhappy and way grumpy. I spent my weekend tied to my laptop working my behind off and had a pretty great Saturday. Sent $22.50 from some advertising money I made plus $14.00 from Sponsored Tweets to my paypal and then proceeded to spend it at Disney.com on two fleece throws for my grandkids with free personalization.

So that was a big plus for me, almost like they were free, but then yesterday I worked all DAY non stop and got nothing. Not one single penny or sign up, then in the evening my girls left for a week to go and stay with their dad and this made me feel terrible. They will be spending Thanksgiving with him and this caught me off guard and has ruined my week, I guess I just feel out of sorts because they are gone and I don't have all my kids under my roof.

So what can I do to feel better??  

TGIF ~! I Am Making Some $$$$$$$$$$$$~!!

Yes! Thank goodness it is Friday! It's been one hell of a week, what began as a good week here turned into a horrible week when my girls got into some issues on the way home from school on Tuesday. Since then I have been dealing with the problem and have spent most of my time with BF getting them back and forward to school and friends houses so they don't have to walk. I still can't talk or blog about what happened because it is too upsetting, all I will say is that there are bullies in this town and everywhere that do what they do because they know that nothing will happen to them. Here in our county it even seems you can plan a group attack on someone and record it and all you get is a ticket that will in the end result in 15 hours of community service. 

Moving on..... I have been so busy working my ad sites and we've managed to pick some sales up. I am spending a lot more time on the sites all in hopes of stashing as much extra money as possible into my paypal for my shopping next month. Right now I might have about $60 not sure... but I will definitely update you all at the end of the month.

I am also at cash out on Crowdtap which is a what? I have no idea what it is but you log in and answer questions and take part in some surveys, cash out is $10 and I am at about $10.50. I will let it go until the very end of November and then cash out and add it to the little shopping nest egg I have going.

Sponsored Tweets is also doing pretty okay. Not turning into a millionaire yet as I only have about 3,500 followers but I am at about $17.00 with $3 more pending and that is going to make a nice little addition to my nest egg. This is money that I will probably spend online on some of the amazing sales that have been popping up so though it doesn't seem like a lot I know it's going to go a long way. I mean the other day I scored $4.95 Reebok's for my grandson! For sure being a part of this bloggy world has taught me how to be a better shopper and never pay full price. I love it!

So this is where I am and what I am doing. I am waiting for a few giveaways to end today to see if I won anything because the plan is also to win a few gifts and spend even less, if I win anything I will let you know!!

Monday Hops!

   

Enjoy Today's Blog Hops!

When the EX Finds Your Blog ~!

As I have noted before I have a blog with my girls where we do reviews and giveaways, and this blog was supposed to be my private and personal blog just for me. I wanted it to be a place where I could write about other things than being a mom, maybe a bit about my BF and I and other personal stuff.

Anything that had to do with my kids or grandkids was going to be on the other blog BUT unfortunately it has been compromised. By this I mean that my girls dad, my ex husband and his wife and kids have now found out about our blog and are now avidly keeping an eye on it. Why?? Who the hell knows... I would think that they would have millions of other things to do with their spare time other than to read about us. 

It is precisely why we had started the blog using a borrowed name of Bravo which is actually my BF's last name, but somehow or other they found us and sure enough when checking my analytics I find that I have 5 readers in Oceanside! So they are not just checking the blog from one IP but from 5 of them. 

It bugs me because it's none of their beezwax you know? I certainly never try to keep up with them and when the girls go and see him I never even ask anything. Why?? Cause I could care less, and now to know that every single word that I write can be read by them is annoying an I guess all I can do is make that blog the best that I can and really show off all the goodies we get, though they will just chalk that up to me being a bum freeloader ( see already I know how they think because these are the kind of things they like to say) but oh, well right?

The good thing is that when I started this blog I made a whole new gmail, twitter and FB. So that I would be able to follow people back that followed me, and now hopefully that means that this blog will stay safe from their prying eyes. And now since I plan on being here alot more then I need to spruce it up and add a few things to make it more me.

Look for some changes soon, and don't forget to comment so I can follow you back!

Amazing Giveaways Round the Blog-Sphere.

So the other night as I sat here worrying about the holiday budget I realized that there are so many giveaways right now that one thing I could do was enter as many as I could in order to win some gifts for the kids. I began to look around and OMG.... there are some AMAZING giveaways right now.

I didn't just find toys but I also found computers, Flip Cameras, Shoes, Handbags, Clothes.. even money. And of course lot's of CSN giveaways' which are the best because with those you can pick whatever you want to buy. I have entered at least 6 so far and have many more to go.

The bloggers have really come up with the absolute best of everything for this month. Right now I have about 20 pages open of giveaways that I found that I need to enter. During the day today I have entered at least 5 and already found a few more linkys with some even more amazing giveaways. 

So now it seems that what I need is time... more time to enter all these and to be able to follow up on them. Most giveaways that I have won in the past have been wins for my daily tweets so I have my little word document going and have all the tweets noted plus how many times to send them per day. My poor followers are porbably going to hate me but this is what giveaways are all about and I hope to win at least a few. With all the time that I am investing into the entries I better get some results!! LOL.

What about you? Have you won anything lately or what would you love to win?

Trip to Los Angeles....

 The Fashion District

 Wilshire Blvd.

 The New Ritz Carlton

There it is, straight up ahead, it's the Hollywood sign in all it's glory. 

Friday Blog Hops!

  

  

Enjoy hopping everyone & we hope you all have a good weekend!

Stressing To The Oldies...

We spent the day at the mall today doing some shopping plus checking out the sales and I can tell you that I am beginning to stress about the holiday shopping. I have my girls, my 3 grandkids and my 4 nephews to buy for. Luckily my mom has been taken care of us a got a Slanket to review on my other blog and that will be her gift. Also BF will be getting a BRUGO mug and that is all. 

Everyone else though!! Too many.... I totally hate that the economy has played such a large part in our finances. My sites are only pulling in about $80 per month when they used to make at least $300 two years ago. Then to top it all off I just got the electric bill and for some strange reason it is about $25 more than usual and of course it's the one due next month.... so instead of having small bills so that I can have a larger budget for my gifts I am starting to get bigger bills.

So I am thinking.... thinking... and all I can think of is to send a huge batch of pitches to all and any companies that I can find for toys for the kids and either clothes or makeup for the girls. The more items I can get to review the less items I have to buy and it will allow me more breathing room.

I love the holidays and I have always tried to make them special for my kids... and I hate feeling such a pinch for cash. Still I will do my best and I will now go and write up the most fantastic pitch letter there ever was and begin to send it out.

And I will totally update my progress here. Feel free to comment and let me know how you are handling the holiday stress.

Have a great night!!

Wednesday Blog Hop Time!

   

Have a lovely hop!

Tuesday Blog Hops

      

  

Enjoy!

Todays Wish Item......

Coffee! I live for coffee and how I would love to have this Keurig B60 Coffee Maker! It's probably one of those that is expensive to run, I remember the last single cup maker I had, had refills that cost a bundle and after finally getting tired of overpaying I threw it away. Yep, I didn't even sell it at a yard sale, I threw it in the trash and it was a pretty expensive machine.

Still this machine is calling my name and it's today's wish item. If you didn't read yesterday's post I am sharing a wishlist of items I would love to have. Because we all know that right now we have to think of other's and not ourselves .... so it's just a little dream exercise……nothing wrong with dreaming!

Monday Hops!

   

 

A wishlist of my own....

I know a lot of us are starting to roll those gift ideas around our head. We have very long lists and some of us might already be stressing about how we are going to be able to afford to get something for all those people on our list. But,,, do any of us ever think of getting a gift for ourselves?

Probably not, especially not during these next two months when we have to think of others before we think of ourselves. But, I would like to make a little dream wish-list for myself. I know that there is no way that I am going to get anything on it but nothing wrong with dreaming, Maybe it can even be a work for it list.... meaning that I will work on my blog until I am able to either review this items or win a few giveaways containing them. 

So to start of my list is something very domesticated but that I have wanted for some time., It's a Paula Deen cookware set, I saw this in person at the mall one day on sale for $150 and I just had to drool and walk away. My kids are pretty hard on our dishes so fancy cookware is not something I would normally splurge on, but I really love this set., It is super high quality and gorgeous, I can even start off with the tea kettle and then add to it.

So this is my first item on my list... tomorrow I shall share a new one. 

What Color Boot Are You?

Boots are all the rage right now especially over the knee boots. In our household everyone has a few pairs in different colors. You can wear them with skinny jeans, legging, short-shorts and even dresses.
So what is your color?

Busy...busy....busy...

I did not have time to do yesterdays post. I have too much work to do on my sites and today it will probably be the same. In a month or so things in the online advertising world will pick up all the way and I will need to be back to at least 6 hours per day working on them, I had gotten a break for the summer but now it's time to get back to work and bring some extra income home for the family.

I have been so busy I haven't even talked to BF since Saturday when he left. Sometimes we chat online or we email back and forth almost daily but I haven't even opened my yahoo this week either. It's a bit peaceful with him gone, and I guess when I get so busy I kind of forget about him. This is really good news, it's certainly much better that when I first met him 4 years ago. When he used to leave I used to spend the entire time all stressed out about where he was or who he was with and it was killing me. Now I don't know why I even worried about it so much, I know where he is, and I know he'll call soon and that he's going to come back. I have had to learn to trust him and it's helped me be at peace.... and accept the situation.

 Like I tell my girls all the time, a man who is going to cheat is going to cheat even if you are watching his every move. Trust is the key, you have to trust your man, and let him go and do what he has to do whether it's work or play or even spending time with their kids and the kids Moms, and whatever will happen will happen. If your man loves you he will be faithful and he will respect your relationship and not cross the lines, it doesn't help to stalk them the entire time and maybe even help drive them to cheating.

So I am at peace, just trying to get enough "me time" to update my blog and get all my work done too. Maybe tonight I can write the dreaded "change" post, last night I tried to do it, I sat here and began the same paragraph like 20 times and gave up and went to bed. It was past midnight, 95 degrees and my brain was out of energy. So tonight I will try again and see if I can come up with anything co-coherent. 

For now I have to go and follow the wonderful ladies that came by from yesterdays hop. If you're a new follower please leave me a comment and I will get back to your blog... have a wonderful day full!

You Inspire Me

Jeannette of A Hippo with a Headband is truly an inspiration, last week while doing my blog hopping I came across her blog and what I read there made me rethink everything that I am doing or rather not doing with my life and myself. I saw the courage and the strength that I have been lacking in this beautiful lady and this made me ask myself why I had to compromise and accept things as they are, it made me realize that I have to change.
If I don't change the things about me that are keeping me from loving myself then no one is going to be able to love me back. My relationship is hanging by a string and my whole family suffers because of my insecurities and it's time to put up or shut the fuck up... :)
Tomorrow I am going to work on a post about the things I have to change about me, I wanted to do it tonight but the truth is it's a bit scary. Those things are the ones that creep into my mind through out the day but then I push them away and refuse to aknwledge them as if by ignoring them they will go away. So I will have to take this slowly and maybe then I can have the same strength Jeannette has and really write the truth about me.

S.O.S. where is the Romance??

Okay so like I have stated before, I love my BF. He is a great guy, he is oh so patient and he is not bad to look at either, well at least to me. And that is very important in a relationship, you have to like and be attracted to your guy or it just won’t work. So I do like him and I think I am attracted, so what is it that is keeping the real romance away?

Actually I'm full of B.S. (among other things), I really am because I know exactly what it is that is keeping any kind of contact away. It’s my weight and the fact that I feel so uncomfortable with myself that I can’t let him touch me…. at least not often.

When I met him I was at my regular weight which was a bit higher than I had ever been but I was comfortable with it, I weighed about 150lbs and wore a size 12. So I certainly wasn’t skinny but I looked great, wore clothes I loved and that looked good on me and I felt pretty hot most of the time.

Fast forward to 4 ½ years later… I weigh as much as he does, 185 lbs!!

Now I wear a size 15 and have an extra person living in the middle of my stomach… I think it might be a twin that wasn’t born all the way but stayed stuck to my mid section instead. So this twin/roll is always there kid of lurking behind my tops and over my pants but the worst thing of all, even worse than the big arms and big tummy is the face. I have two chins now and sometimes when I make a certain face I even have three of them! It’s like my original chin decided to invite friends over for dinner and they don’t want to leave.

So what do I do to make this situation better and to get back to being my old happy and confident self? Nothing, absolutely nothing at all, because I must be some kind of masochist or something and I must enjoy living like a bloated doll that can never wear cute clothes or feel nice next to her man… somebody please slap some sense into me or just slap me for reals… maybe that will wake me the hell up!

Tomorrow he leaves for 2 weeks :(

Why do you leave us??

So A.B. my bf travels to Mexico one week a month and when he goes it is both great and difficult for me. It's like when he's here I am almost sick of him and can't wait till he leaves again. But then when it's time for him to go I wish that he wouldn't go and I begin to miss him before he's even gone. 

Tomorrow morning he leaves, since he's not been there in almost a month he'll probably be gone for two whole weeks and those two weeks are going to be an absolute eternity for me. I will get more work done and  so I might make a bit more money since I will be able to be online with less interruptions, but I love those interruptions!!! Going out to eat, going out for coffee or simply putting the laptop down for a few hours to spend some us time. No more of that for two weeks.....